I was just dancing away on the dance floor and then suddenly decided to look over at him. I saw his gorgeous smile and intent eyes flicker around the room and I just realised, after all this time, we have the right love at the wrong time. Its like... I knew it all along. knew it and I said it and it was just sat at the back of my mind., but I never believed it because I loved him. I do love him. I'm very sure I will always love him. And the feeling I have right now makes me feel like we are soul mates, and one day he will be mine forever. But that time isn't now. It's like I looked through someone else's eyes and realised if we carried on like we were then we're going to break each other. This isn't right. This isn't fair on either of us and I can't pretend i'm happy anymore.
So...
Dear You,
This you is for everyone who is in love at the wrong time, broken from love and waiting for love. It's hard. It sucks. Some days you just want to sit and cry and it feels like you'll never find someone. Sometimes it feels like the what ever choice we make is going to be the wrong one. We all live in fear of ruining our lives but if your not happy things HAVE to change. Things wont just "get better". The pain might be unbearable but in the end it will be worth it for the moment when you realise exactly what you want and your truly happy.
And this you is for you, my dear sweet love, if you ever read this. I'm so sorry. I always said we were the victim of circumstance . Please know i've loved you with all my heart. I truly did. Saying goodbye will be the hardest thing I ever do. It is the hardest thing i've had to do. So just make sure you keep yourself safe, okay? I will always be here for you. Just know that. <3
.... And the suddenly it's like i've never been so lost in my life.
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